14 comments on “Rewiring Your Brain and Heart for Love

  1. Hi. I have no idea who you are and only came here because a friend commented on your facebook post. But I have to say that you have written some beautiful words here. And I’m a guy! Lol. Thanks for the inspiration.

  2. Congrats, but i hope you aren’t rushing into something new and placing thinking too much about if she might be the one. If you are open for advice, take things slow, I hated it when I got into committed relationships so fast that I ended up finding things I really wasn’t ok with but having a commitment made it so much harder. I’m actually kinda disappointed you have forgo the show as you haven’t known Carlie for even a month but if you felt like you weren’t right go to on the show, I respect that. Make sure she has the values you want, she didn’t seem to be dressing very modestly.

    Thanks for being so open with your inner vulnerable thoughts. I just hope you realize that you have so much choice in your favor, and that girls who just pop up and want to be with you are probably not directly caused by personal righteousness. I guess thats a doctrinal disagreement that is too Puritan for me.

    • First off, I would just like to say that I respect your opinion on how Kent’s relationship with Carlie. However, I feel that you are unfair to Carlie in saying how she “did not seem to be dressing very modestly.” I think that you completely ignored the first picture in this blog of the two of them, in which she donned a formal appearance. Just because she did not dress ‘modest’ (it was definitely not an inappropriate attire) for one event does not mean that she lacks the values that Kent has and looks for in his relationship. Furthermore, do you have any idea how hot it is in Venice Beach in June (it’s extreme – plus, look at what other females are wearing, some of the men even have their shirt off!)?

      Anyways, Carlie did not just “pop up” and want to be with Kent. You pointed out how Kent has so much choice in his favor… but then he chooses Carlie over 13 girls, so she must definitely have certain qualities to her that are appealing to Kent. I feel like neither of them ‘popped up’, but it was in their mutual interest to be together.

      I have been watching the Shaytards channel on YouTube for almost a year now and I feel like the way that you are describing Carlie is not characteristic of her at all. Carlie has her own values too and she has a son who she is very protective of. Therefore, what have all these have to do with personal righteousness? Please do not judge Carlie before you know her.

      And Kent did nothing wrong in choosing not to continue on with the show, as he said, why should he continue something when his heart and mind were not in it? <— this is personal righteousness!

      I am sorry if this seems like I am disrespecting you, which I am not trying to do at all. I hope you understand the situation. Have a nice day.

  3. I appreciate the truth that there are things that happen in life beyond our control but love is not one of them. One great true principle is that love is a choice. Of course chemistry and attraction come at times when we least expect it. This is where agency comes into play and we get to choose what we will do with it. Principles of truth cannot change. In your other post you spoke of gaining an understanding of the power of heaven through reading the books Drawing on the Powers of Heaven and Lectures on Faith.

    I have to ask, when was the last time you read them and are you continuing to study them? Now more than ever you need to apply this principle of truth to your life. If you felt power in your life before, can you feel it now? (Alma 5) The choice you make in a spouse will give you the power to accomplish the mission you’ve been sent here to do. I pray that you will strive for the humility needed (Helaman 3:29, 35) to give you the strength to choose the love that will help empower you to accomplish your mission in this life. With the right one you will grow exponentially.

    • Actually… happiness is a choice. How is love a choice? Once you fall for someone you can not just tell yourself not to like them. I really doubt that God would oppose a relationship between two people. If love is a choice, then Kent has a choice to get to know Carlie better and see where it goes and whether or not their values are compatible, until then do not lecture them on who they should and should not be with!

  4. I hope Carlie is the one in the black sweater dressed modestly, my sound card is out on my computer so i can not hear what they are saying. If she is in the pink and dressed in tank top and short skirt, i would have to wonder how deeply she follows the teachings of the church. Good luck to you, im glad you followed your heart. 🙂

    • Carlie is in a tank top. It is 2012 she doesn’t need to have every inch of skin covered to be a good Mormon. Come on now. Don’t judge her you don’t even know her. I ve seen all her videos and it’s obvious she is a beautiful person on the inside as well as out. She has a heart of gold and is always so kind and loving and n amazing mother. I’m so glad they found each other.

      • I’m sorry but the defensive against her dressing immodestly is ridiculous. No one is saying she is a horrible Mormon, but modest dress is very important and if you went through the temple, you can’t wear anything she has. If she dresses like that, she doesn’t seem to understand modesty, like the mormon girls who wear bikinis.

  5. Hi Kent! I started reading your blog for the first time – thanks to Deseret News mentioning your decision to back out of The Mormon Bachelor. Congratulations are in order for you and Carrie. May Heavenly Father bless you both as you continue to get to know one another.

  6. Hi … I’m here on behalf of Carlie. I’m a huge fan of her and her family. To anyone saying that Carlie is not a good & faithful person because she is dressed for warmer weather is ridiculous. If you watched any single one of the videos her & her family have on YouTube you would know she has a kind heart, a great sense of humor and has lots of love in her family. Shaytard fans all over the world would agree that the family has an abundance of love, faith & kindness. I don’t know who Kent is and I hope he treats Carlie right & for him to give up the bachelor show says a lot of his integrity. Don’t judge Carlie Butler because she wore a tank top, watch some videos and realize she is an attentive mum, a loving auntie, a supportive sister, wonderful friend & a cherished daughter.

    • Well said…watch her videos then you see she is an amazing mother and friend and how she dresses isn’t important ~

  7. Hi Kent I just started to read this and I love that you’ve found a new person in your life like Carlie! I have been watching her and her family for a year since last month and I can just tell you Carlie is an awesome person and she always will be! I’m glad that you have found a women as great as her and i’m willing to bet she’s glad she found a man like you. All in all I wish you two the best of luck! But now if you don’t mind me asking how is the relationship with you and Cooper? If you’ve seen the vlogs like I have you know that Cooper Is very protective of his Mother and he won’t just let any guy waltz into her life. Not many people ask about this but i just thought about it and was curious to know. Please try to respond as soon as you can. Good luck to all three of you!

  8. One thing i love about my mormon religion is that we are encouraged not to judge others… Its a shame when you still see it happen though.
    Oh well, no one is perfect =)
    Im sooo happy for you guys, i really do hope you have your happily ever after =)

  9. I’m a real big fan of the Shaytards family and I think you’re a great addition to the big family, you fit in soooo well (: I loved this post and i respect you more now. Bless God for leading you to Carlie<3 I hope you have a good life with Carlie & Cooper, since you already treat both of them well.

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